Thereís something growing in my cup Don't know what it could be I haven't had a drink from it For a week or so, you see I sat it on the kitchen sill And forgot I'd put it there I'm looking at this funny thing Now it's growing hair Oh no! Itís moving Yikes! It's starting to grow Itís now got an extra spike Now I see a toe Itís such a funny shape Green and very thick Yuck! Just looking at it Really makes me sick Iím going to be ill I have to look away It must go down the drain Has to be today I turn the hot tap on And pour in some detergent Getting rid of this thing Is becoming rather urgent I watch it as it bubbles In my little cup The hot water slowly Swishes the green thing up As I rinse my cup I turn the cold tap on And look inside my mug Oh good! It now has gone
Ten hairs On my head One is black Another is red I pull one out Ouch, that hurt The one I pulled Is the colour of dirt
This one is blonde And this one is grey I pull them both Out of the way Out goes another That one as well My headís looking better I can tell Out goes this black one And that one there I really do like Looking after my hair Just a couple more And this one, thatís all Letís look in the mirror Iím feeling rather tall Oh, what have I done? I am so appalled I really canít believe That now I am bald
CATSIN THE TOILET PAPER
What's that scurrying about? It's the sound of tiny paws The cats are along the hallway What's that between their claws?
Oh no! It's the toilet paper That they're dragging behind Along the wooden hallway And over the kitchen blind
There's toilet paper everywhere They've left nothing bare The cats have left a trail While travelling without a care
Now someone is shouting Oh no! It's my Dad He's covered in toilet paper And does look rather mad
Something's moving toward me Skidding on the floor It's Hans, our cute puppy With paper around a paw
The cats have been everywhere Around light shades and plants Toilet paper's handing in cupboards Around our clothes and underpants
The cats have gone outside Paper is wrapped around a pole There seems a lot of paper Oh no! They've got another roll.
Webster is my teddy He feels so warm and strong My favourite of all my toys I have known him for so long
He listens to my stories But does not say too much Just sits there quietly He softens to my touch
Webster loves being cuddled And gives me such a smile He is always well dressed Webster has a lot of style
Webster is very smart And likes to wear bow ties He thinks he looks distinguished Webster wouldn't tell me any lies
When I am not at home He rests on my bed Or sits on the window sill And sometimes a chair instead
He accepts me for who I am Someone on whom I can depend We'll always be together Webster is my best friend.